Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

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Quotes from "Broad Street"


one way to definitely win the game

-17 [+ / -]     Apr 05, 2010

  • Fratty: (yelling into phone) Dude, one of the keys to the game for Duke was "dribble penetration" and I swore I glanced it and it read "double penetration."

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who says romance is dead?

36 [+ / -]     Nov 30, 2009

  • Drunk Guy 1: I totally rubbed my boner on that girl's thigh!
  • Drunk Guy 2: What did she say?
  • Drunk Guy 1: She looked at me and smiled!

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good thing they installed a revolving door at the jail

24 [+ / -]     Jun 25, 2009

  • (Walking away from Buddha Bar to a car)
  • Drunk guy: Man, tonight was great!
  • Sober guy: You better watch out, they are running a road block down the road.
  • Drunk guy: Man, I can't go to jail, my PO would be pissed as hell at me!

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which, despite the misclassification, is mostly true

13 [+ / -]     Sep 13, 2008

  • Guy: (After passing two younger homeless guys) Dude, townies are so gross.

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careful what you wish for... they have night sticks

266 [+ / -]     Jul 14, 2008

  • (As Drunk Guy is getting arrested by the cops and put in cop car)
  • Cop: Any requests?
  • Drunk Guy: Yeah... 95.5 The Beat!

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pea, meet pod

107 [+ / -]     May 04, 2008

  • Guy 1: Man there are a lot of dumb people in this town.
  • (Guy 1 walks into a street sign)
  • Guy 1: Ouch!
  • Guy 2: And you just became a statistic.

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keep digging, man. keep digging.

220 [+ / -]     Apr 11, 2008

  • Bouncer: (checking ID) Oh, happy birthday!
  • Guy: Huh? My birthday is not until November.
  • Bouncer: Your ID says you are 22 today.
  • Guy: Um... that's because it's expired?

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"...well, it's been nice knowing you"

203 [+ / -]     Jun 13, 2007

  • Grad student 1: I don't care. I think every student that misuses the English language should be drug out and shot.
  • Grad student 2: "Dragged."

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The "Am I Too Drunk To Walk the Painted Yellow Line" Test

110 [+ / -]     Mar 25, 2007

  • (Driver honks horn)
  • Drunk sorostitute: Don't you fucking beep your horn at me!
  • Passenger: You're in the fucking middle of the road, bitch!

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dilaogue rejected from recent episode of the o.c.

-25 [+ / -]     Feb 25, 2007

  • Drunk Fratty 1: Dude, I can't believe you kissed her, Man- that's messed upDrunk Fratty 2: Yeah man, she's your girlfriend's roommate, even I know that badDrunk Fratty 3: Dude, my girlfriend was in the room! And let me just say that threesomes aren't all they're cracked up to be... I didn't think your girlfriend was allowed to get mad if she suggested it.

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he gets the award for the world's most longwinded "wtf?"

105 [+ / -]     Nov 02, 2006

  • Drunk guy 1: Listen here you Shakespearean drunk mother fucker. Shut the hell up.
  • Drunk guy 2: Before sequestering my vocals in complianace with your request, I wish to pose a certain query to asertrain the factual merrit of the previous pronoun used, "drunk mother fucker." The query I pose... would I be fucking your mother?

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barfly philosophy

-44 [+ / -]     Jul 28, 2006

  • Drunk guy: Sex is better when you're smart. Otherwise you end up banging an ugly stupid girl and realize... I'm a moron.

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he must be compensating

1 [+ / -]     Mar 13, 2006

  • (There is no sauage anywhere in the general vicinity)
  • Guy: Dude, I'm gonna eat all that sausage! Save me some!

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