Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

Here's the link
 

Quotes from "Snelling"


i thought the drought was over

37 [+ / -]     Apr 20, 2010

  • (Sign on soda machine says, "SORRY - OUT OF CO2!")
  • Girl: What the heck! How do you run out of water?!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


i knew this girl once who poked the entire football team

21 [+ / -]     Apr 19, 2010

  • Girl: so girls just Facebook message you and say they will sleep with you.
  • Athlete: Well, yeah, basically, but not as many at this school.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


can i count that as a charitable donation on my taxes?

36 [+ / -]     Mar 25, 2010

  • Girl 1: You were sucking your friend's date's dick!
  • Girl 2: That doesn't make me a slut, I'm just generous!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


would she then be able to pray the gay away?

-11 [+ / -]     Mar 01, 2010

  • Girl 1: I want every guy I've been with to have to end their story with, "then she went gay and became a nun, the end."
  • Girl 2: We're horrible Catholics. I love you.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


dead wrong

164 [+ / -]     Nov 09, 2009

  • Guy: So, tell me one thing about yourself that nobody else here knows.
  • Girl: (giggling) Okay. I'm a necrophiliac.
  • (Guy is speechless)
  • Girl: Yeah, I know. It's embarrassing. I fall asleep at random times, even in broad daylight.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (2) | Speak Your Piece


and maybe slow down on the motorcycle, too

72 [+ / -]     Apr 09, 2009

  • Girl: So he takes a turn at like, 80 miles per hour, almost throws the bike, and I swear to God my piercing almost rips my clit out.
  • Gay Guy: No more riding for you.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (5) | Speak Your Piece


remember that time when we were all breathing?

125 [+ / -]     Feb 19, 2009

  • Girl 1: Do you remember that time when we were all kind of drunk at Gumby's?
  • Girl 2: Um, you just described all of freshman year.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (8) | Speak Your Piece


looks like the ventriloquism classes are going well

176 [+ / -]     Nov 20, 2008

  • Guy: I give hugs for free!
  • Girl 1: (loudly) Well I give sexual favors for hugs!
  • Girl 2: (at next table) What? No, Mom! That wasn't me talking!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


and in a sexual way, wanna screw?

75 [+ / -]     Nov 07, 2008

  • (During a midnight Snelling run)
  • Gay guy: (to straight guy) In a completely nonsexual way, I'll eat your sausage.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


would you like to make it a fatty?

41 [+ / -]     Oct 09, 2008

  • (Guy is talking on his cell phone standing in line ordering a wrap)
  • Guy on cell: Yeah, lemme get some cheese. Yeah dude, alright. So he only sells dimes and quarters, but it's real cheap. And some jalapeņos. Okay, that's straight. We'll chill later. Just go buy some.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (2) | Speak Your Piece


you roast the beans long enough and the Cs come right out

23 [+ / -]     Jan 23, 2008

  • Girl 1: My friend calls Espresso Royal "ERC" or "ECR" or something.
  • Girl 2: Where does the C come from?
  • Girl 1: Espresso.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


i hear they're fond of cubans as well

-29 [+ / -]     Dec 04, 2007

  • Girl: I really hope we don't get the Orange Bowl.
  • Guy: Why?
  • Girl: 'Cause, like I hate Miami... they are only nice to you if you're Mexican or gay.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


me fail english? that's unpossible!

148 [+ / -]     Nov 15, 2007

  • Guy 1: You're always the pacifist.
  • Girl: Pacifist? You mean like the things babies suck on?
  • Guy 2: No that's a pedophile.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (3) | Speak Your Piece


#16   and your ass for a hat

726 [+ / -]     Nov 09, 2007

  • Girl: (as she walks into Snelling) Wow, I've never noticed how dark it is in here before!
  • Guy: That's because you are still wearing your sunglasses.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


i tripped and fell and ended up at effie's

36 [+ / -]     Nov 06, 2007

  • Girl: So I hear you went to see a burlesque show last night.
  • Guy: It was an accident!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


stacy's mom has got it goin' on

91 [+ / -]     Oct 16, 2007

  • Girl 1: If I was a professor, I'd so have sex with my students if they wanted to raise their grades.
  • Girl 2: Well, when I'm a mom, I totally plan to have sex with all of my son's hot friends.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


ocifer, i swear to drunk i'm not god

49 [+ / -]     Oct 11, 2007

  • Guy 1: Yea man, kegger tonight.
  • Guy 2: When?
  • Guy 1: Round 10 pm. But I'm not drinking too long... gotta go to court tomorrow.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


at least she likes mexican food

127 [+ / -]     Sep 03, 2007

  • Southern sorostitute: This year, on Cinco de Mayo, I had to take the SAT the next day, so I couldn't actually party on Cinco de Mayo. So because I couldn't party on Cinco de Mayo, my friends threw me a party on Cinco de Six!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


its their world... we just live in it

55 [+ / -]     Aug 30, 2007

  • Sorostitute: This Milledge bus is taking way to long. I'm going to call the information number.
  • (She calls)
  • Sorostitute: Um, yes, I was just wondering when the next Milledge bus is coming, I'm at Snelling. I've been waiting 30 minutes.
  • (pause)
  • Sorostitute: What?! It's not coming for another 30 minutes? Well there's like 15 people here, can't you send a taxi for us?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


jessica simpson would be so proud

163 [+ / -]     May 08, 2007

  • (Sorostitute eyes chicken suspiciously)
  • Guy in line: Are you gonna get the chicken?
  • Sorostitute: No, I don't think so. Athens isn't exactly close to the ocean.
  • (Staff stares blankly)
  • Sorostitute: I'll have the seafood fried rice, please.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


i wonder if the pun was intentional

-24 [+ / -]     Mar 26, 2007

  • Guy 1: How are the hot dogs today?
  • Guy 2: What do you mean? They're hot dogs. When was the last time you had a shitty hot dog?
  • Guy 1: Yeah, but how are they today?
  • Guy 2: Well, I guess they're totally tubular, ass.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


but not everyone inhales

36 [+ / -]     Mar 01, 2007

  • (A plate is heard hitting the floor near the tray returns, people laugh)
  • Guy: Shut up! Everyone's done it!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


it costs more than that from the trannies on prince

4 [+ / -]     Feb 22, 2007

  • Sorostitute: I mean... I felt kinda felt compelled... He really deserved it, you know? He, like, took me to Starbucks and everything.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


like a week later

-21 [+ / -]     Dec 11, 2006

  • Fratty 1: So what happened with your date? You got stood up?
  • Fratty 2: No, I didnt get stood up! She just called me really late!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


6 of one, half dozen of the other

75 [+ / -]     Sep 10, 2006

  • Girl: I have a question about the new facebook notices. If you are a guy and take off "is interested in women," does it say "X is no longer interested in women" or does it say "X has come out of the closet?"

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


anonymous AIDS tests at the health center are only $35

365 [+ / -]     Sep 08, 2006

  • Freshman girl: Monday morning was the weirdest morning of my life. I woke up in someone's apartment with twelve other people and none of us was wearing pants.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


because polar water caps is just wrong

28 [+ / -]     Sep 02, 2006

  • Guy: You don't need to put ice in your water. It's already cold. The ice just takes up space and will be part of the water anyway.
  • Girl: (with very confused look) Ice isn't water!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


so... do you have an pistol or an ak47?

-22 [+ / -]     Aug 26, 2006

  • Girl: We should go to a firing range.
  • Guy: I hear they have a really good one in Athens. I read this article that a bunch of porn stars go there.
  • Girl: That's... hot?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


it's actually a synonym for celibacy

282 [+ / -]     Aug 18, 2006

  • Older guy to two girls: Halo isn't a game to me. It's more like a sexual preference.Girls: ...

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


and kegs always get tapped

-24 [+ / -]     Jun 27, 2006

  • Guy: I'm working on a six pack.
  • Hefty woman: I've got a keg.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


so they've never had sex?

55 [+ / -]     May 16, 2006

  • Girl 1: I've had like six of these margaritas and I still can't feel anything!
    Girl 2: You do realize that those are virgin margaritas?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


do cows really have nipples?

42 [+ / -]     May 05, 2006

  • Guy: Soy Milk is not milk.
    Girl: It is too!
    Guy: Do soy plants have nipples?
    Girl: Eww, no
    Guy: Then there you go. Enjoy your soy juice.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


nothin says F like a big ol' cock

43 [+ / -]     May 03, 2006

  • Guy: If you're gonna fail that test, you might as well draw an obscene cartoon on it.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


technologogy is in general

-30 [+ / -]     Apr 21, 2006

  • Guy: Text messages are hard to interpretate.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


never mention goats around her

18 [+ / -]     Apr 10, 2006

  • (Two girls are looking at The Red & Black)
  • Girl 1: What's it about?
    Girl 2: Tipping.
    Girl 1: Oh... I'm so Ellijay, I thought of cows.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


"...and that's why you don't masturbate, son"

-21 [+ / -]     Apr 04, 2006

  • Shocked Kid: Man, that sounds awful!
    Guy: And before you know it, you wake up dead!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


we're taking the leg, soldier

13 [+ / -]     Mar 29, 2006

  • Girl to another girl: Oh don't worry, it's nothing a little whiskey and a razor won't fix.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


and soon he'll be enrolled in the joint

35 [+ / -]     Mar 28, 2006

  • Guy: So, [random frat boy] hooked up with a high schooler at the band party last night.
    Girl: No way!
    Guy: Yeah, his excuse was, "She's joint enrolled."

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


"i don't feel the need to explain my art to you"

-16 [+ / -]     Mar 23, 2006

  • Girl: Why'd y'all put them meatballs in there?
    Guy: Look, I don't have the answer to your question.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


how much of that involves peaunut butter and his dog?

-20 [+ / -]     Mar 01, 2006

  • Fratty 1: I scratch my balls alot. I would say that I spend about 10 percent of my time manipulating my balls in some way.
    Fratty 2: Only 10?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


"actually, it was because of the massive amount of coke in my bloodstream"

-15 [+ / -]     Feb 13, 2006

  • Guy 1: So I was going 140 in a 35. I made it to Barrow county in like 5 minutes.
    Guy 2: And you didn't get pulled over?
    Guy 1: I did. And the cop was like "Didn't you see me sitting there? Oh wait, I guess that's because you had tunnel vision."

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece