Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

Here's the link
 

Quotes from "Target"


are they talking about prices, or their IQs?

21 [+ / -]     May 14, 2010

  • Redneck Girl 1:Hey, what's 11 plus 12?
  • Redneck Girl 2: Um, I don't know. Let me get my cell phone out.

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its an olde storey

105 [+ / -]     Jan 07, 2009

  • Woman: (to daughter) I didn't work this hard raising you so you could dress like some whore who done run away from the fucking renaissance fair!

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no, but i figured it was worth a shot

94 [+ / -]     Jul 09, 2008

  • Guy: Can I get my paycheck, please?
  • Woman: Do you work here?

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you have learned much, grasshopper

73 [+ / -]     Jun 03, 2008

  • (Mother and daughter at checkout lane)
  • Daughter: So, we total up all our receipts, find out how much we spent, and then not tell daddy because he doesn't need to know.

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introducing the new celibacy diet

21 [+ / -]     Apr 07, 2008

  • Sorostitute: Oh my gosh, I can't even get this size 9 all the way on, I've gotten so big. It's my hips! Ugh, no more sex for me.

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monday is fair game

105 [+ / -]     Mar 03, 2008

  • Redneck Father: I'm leavin' you.
  • Redneck Son: I'm gonna kill you!
  • Redneck Mother: No killins on Sunday.

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fresh from the garden

42 [+ / -]     Sep 20, 2007

  • Sorostitute 1: I'm so unhealthy, y'all. I've got to start eating vegetables.
  • Sorostitute 2: Yeah, that's a good idea.
  • Sorostitute 3: Oh, I know... let's start with apples!

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let him help you pick out lingerie... that won't screw him up at all

104 [+ / -]     Aug 05, 2007

  • (Little boy holds up a large bra)
  • Boy: Mommy, this one!
  • Mom: No honey, that's for after the surgery.

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peer pressure applies to many situations

-32 [+ / -]     May 27, 2007

  • Sorostitute 1: Really, you should be proud of me... I haven't shacked in three days!
  • Sorostitute 2: Thats a really long time!
  • Sketchy fratty: Wanna change that tonight?

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she's the one sitting in the middle of the floor

-32 [+ / -]     May 24, 2007

  • On cashier's walkie-talkie: Attention Target associates. We have a guest that has lost her walking cane in the store. Please be on the lookout for a walking cane.

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like any male really cares where it came from

-28 [+ / -]     May 12, 2007

  • (Sorostitute 1 Holds up a bikini)
  • Sorostitute 2: That is so cute.
  • Sorostitute 1: I know... but I just can't buy a swimsuit from Target.

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the movie candy diet is so in right now

-14 [+ / -]     Dec 20, 2006

  • Sorostitute on cell: No, I'm looking at them right now. No, I am sure that Sourpatch Kids don't have saturated fat... Yeah, I'm sure, it says so right here!

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and so that's why they invented dressing rooms

-27 [+ / -]     Nov 27, 2006

  • Girl 1: Look at that guy's penis!Girl 2: Shhh!

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a really long bridge

24 [+ / -]     Sep 22, 2006

  • Roomie 1: Wow, look at that tag. It's from Hawaii. You don't see that everyday.
  • Roomie 2: Cool! How did they drive it here?

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six figures are the new six pack

120 [+ / -]     Sep 18, 2006

  • Girl 1: I really just love young professionals.Girl 2: Yeah. There's something so attractive about a salary.

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h2O soooooo cool

-7 [+ / -]     Feb 19, 2006

  • Girl 1: I am so bringing some bottled water to formal. I did last time and it was soooooo cool.
    Girl 2: Why?
    Girl 1: The hotel water sucks. Everyone will want my bottled water. It will be soooooo cool!
    Girl 2: You totally rock.

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"it'll compliment my gonorrhea so well!"

14 [+ / -]     Feb 17, 2006

  • Girl 1: So, I like know everything about STDs. I learned it when I was a little kid.
    Girl 2: Really? That's cool.
    Girl 1: Yeah, did you know that 25% of girls have genital herpes? But, like 90% will never know it. 50% of guys have herpes.
    Girl 2: Ohmigod, look at this KY Warming Sensations! It's sapphire!
    Girl 1: No way! Let's get some for formal.

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