Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

Here's the link
 

Quotes submitted by "Snoopy"

dead wrong

164 [+ / -]     Nov 09, 2009

  • Guy: So, tell me one thing about yourself that nobody else here knows.
  • Girl: (giggling) Okay. I'm a necrophiliac.
  • (Guy is speechless)
  • Girl: Yeah, I know. It's embarrassing. I fall asleep at random times, even in broad daylight.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (2) | Speak Your Piece


don't get snippy with me, mon

175 [+ / -]     Nov 21, 2008

  • Girl: So, are you going home to Jamaica over Christmas break?
  • Jamaican Guy: No, my father and I are going to get naturalized next month!
  • Girl: (cringing, looking at Jamaican Guy's crotch) Won't that... hurt?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (3) | Speak Your Piece


looks like the ventriloquism classes are going well

176 [+ / -]     Nov 20, 2008

  • Guy: I give hugs for free!
  • Girl 1: (loudly) Well I give sexual favors for hugs!
  • Girl 2: (at next table) What? No, Mom! That wasn't me talking!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


no guts no glory

170 [+ / -]     May 08, 2008

  • Girl 1: I was walking outside Park Hall when I felt something wet and nasty hit the back of my neck.
  • Girl 2: Ew... bird poop?
  • Girl 1: No! Get this... it was a hawk or something squeezing the guts out of a baby squirrel... and when I looked up all these squirrel guts hit me in the face!
  • Girl 2: That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard!
  • Girl 1: So, anyway... do you think this was an omen?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


talk about an impacted colon

134 [+ / -]     Apr 29, 2008

  • Guy 1: I finally did it. I have now eaten all 28 varieties of cold cereal at the ECV dining hall! It's taken me all year to try them all!
  • Guy 2: We're not worthy! We're not worthy!
  • Guy 1: Yeah, I didn't think I was gonna make it through that last one. That All-Bran stuff was nasty and I spent all yesterday morning in the john.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


this might be the next tom cruise movie

157 [+ / -]     Apr 17, 2008

  • Ice Cream Guy: Do you want the cone or the show?
  • Girl: The show!
  • (Ice Cream Guy scoops ice cream, throws it ten feet in the air, catches it perfectly in cone, and hands it to her)
  • Girl: God, I love college!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (6) | Speak Your Piece


keep digging, man. keep digging.

220 [+ / -]     Apr 11, 2008

  • Bouncer: (checking ID) Oh, happy birthday!
  • Guy: Huh? My birthday is not until November.
  • Bouncer: Your ID says you are 22 today.
  • Guy: Um... that's because it's expired?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


which must mean he's a shitty boyfriend

228 [+ / -]     Apr 06, 2008

  • Guy on Cell: Yeah, I finally found out what happened to my boxers the other night when Katie and I got naked at her apartment. She called me the next day and said her cat had buried them in its litter box.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


at least she didn't mention the stains the dry cleaner couldn't get out

254 [+ / -]     Apr 01, 2008

  • Guy: I gave Joyce a ride home last weekend. She wanted to pick up some stuff at the dry cleaners on the way out of Athens. I drop her off at her home and the next morning my mom is all upset. Joyce had left a message on our answering machine that said, "Hey, I left my dress in your car last night..."

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


"...i'm the one who always has the confused look"

274 [+ / -]     Feb 21, 2008

  • Sorostitute: Wow! How tall are you?
  • Giant Fratty: Five foot, sixteen inches.
  • Sorostitute: (after a pause) Heh heh, oh, so you're six foot one.
  • Giant Fratty: Uh, riiiight. I know you from somewhere.
  • Sorostitute: I'm in your calculus class!

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


and do your math homework

259 [+ / -]     Feb 21, 2008

  • Brother Micah: Just remember, life can be so much easier if you just trust in these four words... "read your bible!"

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (0) | Speak Your Piece


#4   too late

1058 [+ / -]     Feb 09, 2008

  • Sorostitute on cell: Hey! My lucky red thong came through for me! He actually wanted to... hey, let me call you back... I think some people here are listening and I don't want this all over the Internet.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece


i prophesy an "f"

319 [+ / -]     Feb 06, 2008

  • Guy 1: The first two weeks of intro to accounting last semester, every time they said "profits" I thought they were saying "prophets."
  • Guy 2: Dude, seriously, were you home-schooled?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (2) | Speak Your Piece


#6   congratulations, you're hired

948 [+ / -]     Feb 04, 2008

  • Management professor: If you suspected someone was smoking marijuana on the job, what would you look for?
  • Guy: Doritos?

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (2) | Speak Your Piece


and you're friend has been dieting wrong

268 [+ / -]     Feb 03, 2008

  • Sorostitute 1: So how the hell are you?
  • Sorostitute 2: Well, you know what they say... same shit, different color.
  • Sorostitute 1: Oh wow, all these years I've been saying that wrong.

Link / Email This | Bookmark and Share

Comments (1) | Speak Your Piece