Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

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Quotes Filed Under "Dining hall"


understanding temperature is not one of them

-57 [+ / -]     Mar 09, 2009

  • Fratty 1: All of this snow and shit better be gone when I get back from fucking spring break, man.
  • Fratty 2: It'll be over a week from now, so I'm pretty sure it'll all be gone.
  • Fratty 1: You never know man. Global warming does all kinds of crazy shit.

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mount up!

103 [+ / -]     Feb 18, 2009

  • (Outside of O-House, two guys are petting a horse)
  • Guy 1: Dude, I've never pet a horse before!
  • Guy 2: I mean, some of the girls you date...

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looks like the ventriloquism classes are going well

176 [+ / -]     Nov 20, 2008

  • Guy: I give hugs for free!
  • Girl 1: (loudly) Well I give sexual favors for hugs!
  • Girl 2: (at next table) What? No, Mom! That wasn't me talking!

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dirty hands and a dirty mouth

-126 [+ / -]     Nov 19, 2008

  • (Student is reaching for cookies using his hands)
  • Dining hall lady: Use those tongs, use those tongs now.
  • Student: Fuck off.

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and in a sexual way, wanna screw?

73 [+ / -]     Nov 07, 2008

  • (During a midnight Snelling run)
  • Gay guy: (to straight guy) In a completely nonsexual way, I'll eat your sausage.

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would you like to make it a fatty?

42 [+ / -]     Oct 09, 2008

  • (Guy is talking on his cell phone standing in line ordering a wrap)
  • Guy on cell: Yeah, lemme get some cheese. Yeah dude, alright. So he only sells dimes and quarters, but it's real cheap. And some jalapeños. Okay, that's straight. We'll chill later. Just go buy some.

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she's counting herself twice, which leaves two people

60 [+ / -]     Oct 03, 2008

  • Sorostitute 1: You have way too many guys. How many people are in love with you?
  • Sorostitute 2: Including me? Four.

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neither... one just moved

-37 [+ / -]     Sep 12, 2008

  • Sorostitute: In the black cherry ice cream, are those black things cherries or chocolate?

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someone should tell him the camo doesn't really help him blend in

24 [+ / -]     May 29, 2008

  • A giant blood droplet is scaring people into giving blood in front of Snelling Dining Commons

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they go straight for the whipped cream

-30 [+ / -]     May 26, 2008

  • (Talking about going on a date)
  • Girl 1: Well, you two could meet at Bolton?
  • Girl 2: I don't really like the food there
  • Girl 3: Well who eats at booty call events anyway?

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clearly, the cold war is not over

-44 [+ / -]     May 10, 2008

  • Guy 1: Our two high school counites are rivals.
  • Guy 2: Really, why?
  • Guy 1: Because we beat you guys every year.
  • Guy 2: Yeah, but why do we have to fight?
  • Guy 1: I mean, why do North Korea and South Korea fight?
  • Guy 1: Because North Korea overtook South Korea.
  • Guy 2 : That has nothing to do with counties
  • Guy 1: Yes it does, it explains everything.

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talk about an impacted colon

136 [+ / -]     Apr 29, 2008

  • Guy 1: I finally did it. I have now eaten all 28 varieties of cold cereal at the ECV dining hall! It's taken me all year to try them all!
  • Guy 2: We're not worthy! We're not worthy!
  • Guy 1: Yeah, I didn't think I was gonna make it through that last one. That All-Bran stuff was nasty and I spent all yesterday morning in the john.

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this might be the next tom cruise movie

157 [+ / -]     Apr 17, 2008

  • Ice Cream Guy: Do you want the cone or the show?
  • Girl: The show!
  • (Ice Cream Guy scoops ice cream, throws it ten feet in the air, catches it perfectly in cone, and hands it to her)
  • Girl: God, I love college!

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"...i thought i didn't smell something"

35 [+ / -]     Apr 08, 2008

  • Sorostitute 1: Your hair looks nice today. Did you do something different?
  • Sorostitute 2: I washed it.
  • Sorostitute 1: Oooh. That's new.

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finally... the tables have turned

296 [+ / -]     Mar 29, 2008

  • Bus Driver: I'm disappointed in you guys. We could have fit in 20 more people.
  • Girl: Shut the fuck up and take us to Snelling.

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and you're friend has been dieting wrong

264 [+ / -]     Feb 03, 2008

  • Sorostitute 1: So how the hell are you?
  • Sorostitute 2: Well, you know what they say... same shit, different color.
  • Sorostitute 1: Oh wow, all these years I've been saying that wrong.

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with a side of moron

72 [+ / -]     Nov 14, 2007

  • Deli worker: And would you like any condiments on this, ma'am?
  • Sorostitute: Yes. Lettuce.
  • Deli worker: (confused) Any condiments?
  • Sorostitute: Yes. Lettuce.

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#14   and your ass for a hat

704 [+ / -]     Nov 09, 2007

  • Girl: (as she walks into Snelling) Wow, I've never noticed how dark it is in here before!
  • Guy: That's because you are still wearing your sunglasses.

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i'm not sure we all understand the problem

100 [+ / -]     Oct 23, 2007

  • Two girls are talking about the drought)
  • Girl 1: Have you heard that we might run out of water?
  • Girl 2: We can't run out of water!
  • Girl 1: What? Yes we can.
  • Girl 2: No, we can just go get it from the dining hall!

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stacy's mom has got it goin' on

89 [+ / -]     Oct 16, 2007

  • Girl 1: If I was a professor, I'd so have sex with my students if they wanted to raise their grades.
  • Girl 2: Well, when I'm a mom, I totally plan to have sex with all of my son's hot friends.

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its their world... we just live in it

56 [+ / -]     Aug 30, 2007

  • Sorostitute: This Milledge bus is taking way to long. I'm going to call the information number.
  • (She calls)
  • Sorostitute: Um, yes, I was just wondering when the next Milledge bus is coming, I'm at Snelling. I've been waiting 30 minutes.
  • (pause)
  • Sorostitute: What?! It's not coming for another 30 minutes? Well there's like 15 people here, can't you send a taxi for us?

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like the beginning of that kubrick movie

-56 [+ / -]     Aug 28, 2007

  • (Two guys are standing in line for pizza)
  • Freshman fratty: Dude!
  • Older guy: Yeah?
  • Freshman fratty: You know the coolest thing about this pizza? They put the pizza in one end, and it comes out the other end already cooked!

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jessica simpson would be so proud

160 [+ / -]     May 08, 2007

  • (Sorostitute eyes chicken suspiciously)
  • Guy in line: Are you gonna get the chicken?
  • Sorostitute: No, I don't think so. Athens isn't exactly close to the ocean.
  • (Staff stares blankly)
  • Sorostitute: I'll have the seafood fried rice, please.

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money well spent

64 [+ / -]     May 02, 2007

  • Girl 1: What has everyone learned in college?
  • Guy 1: How to make termites run in a circle.
  • Girl 2: How to stretch my liver.
  • Guy 2: I don't need a liver.

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I don't remember soap, it was all water...

45 [+ / -]     Apr 27, 2007

  • Guy: So if nothing happened, what did happen?
  • Girl: Not saying, but he drunk dialed me the other night.
  • Guy: Then he probably thought that though nothing happened, there was the possibility of something happening.
  • Girl: But, I mean, nothing happened. We just got out of the shower... uuuhh.
  • Guy: Yeah, right, because showering together is nothing. Got it.

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for kids 12 and up

43 [+ / -]     Apr 21, 2007

  • Employee: I feel sick. I think I'm dying.
  • Boss: You'll be fine. Here, want to play with this razor blade?

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i wonder if the pun was intentional

-24 [+ / -]     Mar 26, 2007

  • Guy 1: How are the hot dogs today?
  • Guy 2: What do you mean? They're hot dogs. When was the last time you had a shitty hot dog?
  • Guy 1: Yeah, but how are they today?
  • Guy 2: Well, I guess they're totally tubular, ass.

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her name must be simile

36 [+ / -]     Mar 16, 2007

  • Girl on phone: So like, in class it's like, no one will like, say anything like, smart, you know?

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but not everyone inhales

37 [+ / -]     Mar 01, 2007

  • (A plate is heard hitting the floor near the tray returns, people laugh)
  • Guy: Shut up! Everyone's done it!

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you know, on the floor...

47 [+ / -]     Apr 05, 2006

  • Girl on cell: (trying to describe which table she is at) No, no, no, we're under the ceiling.

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