Quotes Filed Under "Drinking"


careful what you wish for... they have night sticks

208 [+ / -]     Jul 14, 2008

  • (As Drunk Guy is getting arrested by the cops and put in cop car)
  • Cop: Any requests?
  • Drunk Guy: Yeah... 95.5 The Beat!

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we call that living vicariously

31 [+ / -]     Jul 04, 2008

  • Girl 1: (referring to Girl 2's sandwich) Here, let me get that for you.
  • Girl 2: No, you're always buying me stuff.
  • Girl 1: Nuh uh, what?
  • Girl 2: Like drinks downtown.
  • Girl 1: Oh, that's because you're the DD.

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did we have a good time?

-8 [+ / -]     Jun 30, 2008

  • Drunk Girl 1: So what did you do tonight?
  • Drunk Girl 2: I went downtown with you dum-dum.
  • Drunk Girl 1: Oh yeah, I think someone just told me that!

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the townie version of "one bourbon, one scotch, and one beer"

52 [+ / -]     Jun 30, 2008

  • Drunk guy placing an order: Yeah, can i get a chocolate shake, a PBR and a water?

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and the teamsters just wouldn't allow that

31 [+ / -]     Jun 28, 2008

  • Girl 1: Oh, that was nice, he bought us shots!
  • Girl 2: Yeah, but mine was warm. So he could have had time to roofie it!
  • Girl 1: No, he's legit... he's a truck driver!

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in my day, we had to walk uphill both ways to funnel beer

58 [+ / -]     Jun 26, 2008

  • Granny Gettin' Fucked Up!

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sex, drugs, and h2o

53 [+ / -]     Jun 26, 2008

  • Freshman Girl: (to her friend) Yeah, I'm thinking about dropping a lot of things, like eating after 12am, chocolate, and basically everything except drinking water and hooking up with random boys. Oh, and except alcohol.

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and as we all know, listening skills are against their religion

-46 [+ / -]     Jun 25, 2008

  • Guy: (talking to a group of strangers) Your friend is drunk.
  • Girl: Im not Jewish! I'm Fucking Protestant!

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and did you make sure she had her lunch money?

121 [+ / -]     Jun 24, 2008

  • (Watching Sorostitute dance on a bar)
  • Girl: I don't think that girl is wearing any underwear.
  • Guy 1: Are you sure? Maybe its just a thong.
  • Girl: Um... I don't think so.
  • Guy 2: Yeah, she's wearing underwear. I made sure before we left the house.

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