Brand New:
Overseen in Athens


For years you've been watching your tongue so that what you say doesn't end up here. Now, you'll have to watch how you look. You never know who has a camera.

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Quotes Filed Under "Wtf?"


from the set of katherine heigl's new romantic comedy

32 [+ / -]     May 25, 2009

  • Girl 1: I don't know if he thinks it's a real date or not.
  • Girl 2: I'll be able to tell through my binoculars.

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they're easier to catch that way

56 [+ / -]     May 06, 2009

  • (Two guys watch an attractive woman with a limp walk by)
  • Guy 1: Aw, she has a limp.
  • Guy 2: I like that in a girl.

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just in time for mother's day

66 [+ / -]     Apr 09, 2009

  • Sorostitute on Cell: You know, I should tell him that I can't fill out my shirt so that he'll get me a boob job.
  • (pause)
  • Sorostitute on Cell: No way, Mom! You're getting one? Can we get them together?

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there's so much to say...

53 [+ / -]     Apr 04, 2009

  • (In the men's room, Dave Matthews is playing)
  • Fratty: Oh man, Dave Matthews!
  • Guy: Yes, one of the few musicians that can mumble and still make millions. Don't get me wrong, he's good though.
  • Fratty: Yeah, man! I used to beat off to Dave Matthews when I was 14.

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excuse me sir, can you help me find the poultry science building?

81 [+ / -]     Mar 26, 2009

  • Random turkey walking around in the parking lot

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i always thought tim meadows would drive a nicer car

36 [+ / -]     Mar 25, 2009

  • No words can express this...

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eating disorder? what eating disorder?

73 [+ / -]     Feb 25, 2009

  • Tennis Instructor: Do any of you know why it's important have a low BMI?
  • Student: Because it means you're healthier.
  • Tennis Instructor: Well yes... but more importantly, you look better naked.

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they're clearly from another planet, so the answer could be anything

-42 [+ / -]     Feb 23, 2009

  • Technician 1: How many toes are you supposed to have?
  • Technician 2: Uh... seriously?
  • Technician 1: Yes seriously, I haven't counted lately!

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put on a hockey mask

36 [+ / -]     Feb 21, 2009

  • Random girl: So, I mean, a cop pulls you over and finds a thirteen inch machete in your trunk, what are you supposed to do?

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this stem cell research thing has really gotten out of hand

48 [+ / -]     Feb 18, 2009

  • Stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason.

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hearing voices doesn't necessarily make you nuts

66 [+ / -]     Feb 17, 2009

  • Religion Professor: I spend most of my time in the ancient world. I don't have TV or Internet. If you need to get in contact with me, meditate and speak with me and we can talk. I also am a compulsive liar because I like telling exciting stories about religion.

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speed dating is a growing trend in college towns

-48 [+ / -]     Feb 13, 2009

  • Female Customer: Do we bring back books here?
  • Male Employee: Yeah, I'll be your friend.
  • Female Employee: Wait, are you returning the books or doing Buy Back?
  • Female Customer: Returns.
  • Male Employee: Oh, I guess we can't be friends anymore.
  • Female Customer: Yeah. I don't love you anymore. It's over.
  • (Customer walk away)

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and thus began uga's synchronized shitting team

63 [+ / -]     Feb 05, 2009

  • Fratty: Hey, have you seen a group of, like, seven guys down here?
  • Student Employee: No, not unless they're all in the bathroom.
  • Fratty: Ah! Okay, thanks.
  • (Fratty walks towards bathroom)

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don't forget to take wind resistance into account

58 [+ / -]     Feb 03, 2009

  • Athlete 1: What is the size of Africa?
  • Athlete 2: It's 200,000 square miles per hour.

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honesty is not always the best policy

77 [+ / -]     Feb 02, 2009

  • Seen at Wal-Mart on the eastside. This economy is really bad...

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turns out it's death by non sequitur

23 [+ / -]     Jan 16, 2009

  • Fratty 1: That projector doesn't look safe. I wouldn't sit under it.
  • Fratty 2: Oh, I'm not. When I'm in a room I go ahead and look around to figure out all the ways the Final Destination movie would try to kill me.
  • Fratty 1: Oh... so did you get with that chick last night?

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the economy is making it tough for people specialized in one field

44 [+ / -]     Jan 16, 2009

  • This add for a job was on the university Dawglink website under off-campus jobs.

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that's one way to get into the HOV lane

26 [+ / -]     Jan 14, 2009

  • The (cat, bunny, mouse?) seat covers of a mini-van.

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as opposed to a non-up-the-butt enema

-68 [+ / -]     Jan 13, 2009

  • Girl 1: So yeah, like I totally had the worst Christmas break ever! My family was driving me crazy and I just wanted to come back and get away!
  • Girl 2: That sucks, mine was pretty great.
  • Girl 1: And to top it all off, the dog was having seizures and we had to give him an enema up his butt. Do you even comprehend how not-fun that was?
  • Girl 2: Damn.

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wonder who insures cheney?

56 [+ / -]     Jan 07, 2009

  • Prince Avenue, Normaltown.

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how's it hanging?

125 [+ / -]     Jan 07, 2009

  • (In the underwear department at Wal-Mart)
  • Redneck Mom: (holding up a pair of panties) How about these?
  • Redneck Daughter: (yelling) My coochie don't hang that low, mama!

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there needs to be a better tie breaker for "not it"

75 [+ / -]     Dec 26, 2008

  • Girl 1: So this drunk homeless guy peed himself in one of the library chairs yesterday.
  • Girl 2: Who cleaned it?
  • Girl 1: No one... they just put a sign on it that said, "Do not sit in this chair."

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desperate times call for desperate measures

133 [+ / -]     Dec 17, 2008

  • Girl 1: So, it's seriously not cheating if your dad is in the hospital detoxing and your boyfriend has a brain tumor?
  • Girl 2: Plus with finals coming up.
  • Girl 1: Exactly.

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you could bottle that kind of crazy

19 [+ / -]     Dec 09, 2008

  • Guy: He had some crazy ass name like John.

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murphy says yes

48 [+ / -]     Dec 08, 2008

  • Sorostitute: Do you think that thing is going to be on the test?
  • Fratty: What thing?
  • Sorostitute: You know, that thing that wasn't in the notes and we didn't cover in class.
  • Fratty: (stares) Yeah.

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we had to google this one... and now our minds are scarred

37 [+ / -]     Dec 01, 2008

  • Found on Lumpkin Street while walking to tailgate in 2007

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clearly another excellent breeding decision

15 [+ / -]     Nov 16, 2008

  • Sorority Girl 1: So all I know is that he is in jail and is waiting to get deported.
  • Sorority Girl 2: Deported? That sucks. How is he going to help with the baby?
  • Sorority Girl 1: Oh. She's not telling him about the baby... that would be way too much drama and she is scared he would try to stay in the country for it... you know... to be a dad.
  • Sorority Girl 2: Yeah. That makes sense. I wouldn't want him around either.

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help! my daisy dukes are altering the space-time continuum!

-7 [+ / -]     Nov 08, 2008

  • half naked african american cross dresser outside of Bourbon Street.

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she was consistently the mvp

61 [+ / -]     Nov 04, 2008

  • there are no words.

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